THEN and NOW

The following post was originally posted at Killer Rants blogger version on Wednesday, June 14, 2006.

Liz compares:

I was recently told by a work friend that, although an attractive woman, I am no supermodel. Where did that statement come from? I would venture to guess directly out of his hairy ass, but that would be presumptuous. I felt violated by the statement; I wasn’t asking for his assessment, he just laid it out there, unprovoked. I found it strange and meaningless but it’s stuck with me for 8 nights now. I’ve broken it down to mean these things:

* You’re not hideous, but don’t go without makeup
If you’d lose 30 pounds, I might be interested
You’re pretty enough… for someone who’s not really into looks
You’ll find a good mate, but don’t be surprised when he dumps you for a hot chic
Your genes should die with you when you go

He was telling me about his request to his wife for a divorce. As he spoke on this intensely personal subject, I heard one theme: I loved her as a girlfriend, hate her as a spouse. This got me thinking: is what makes a good girlfriend the same qualities you seek in a wife? Let’s break THIS down:

* GOOD GIRLFRIEND: Flirty and fun, all your guy friends love her
* GOOD WIFE: Hardly speaks to your friends, stays home, doesn’t flirt at all
* GOOD GIRLFRIEND: Wears sexy clothes and shows off her body
* GOOD WIFE: Owns granny panties; multiple turtlenecks
* GOOD GIRLFRIEND: Can out drink half the guys you know
* GOOD WIFE: Takes sips from your beer when she brings you a fresh one
* GOOD GIRLFRIEND: Plans fun weekends for the two of you
* GOOD WIFE: Doesn’t want to go anywhere
* GOOD GIRLFRIEND: Loves any present you give her- almost a guarantee you’ll get laid
* GOOD WIFE: Quit expecting presents years ago
* GOOD GIRLFRIEND: Too busy being with you to keep the house clean
* GOOD WIFE: Scrubs your pee off the toilet seat without complaining

I don’t get it. One day I’ll make a list of what makes a good boyfriend. I still have no idea what makes a good husband… but I know that telling you that you’re no supermodel won’t make the list.

•   Comments(1)    Posted by liz on 06/28 at 06:02 PM
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