It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas

I am pleased to announce my return home from business in Chicago- where I was stranded on the side of the road while our cab was burning, where I was almost left in Cicero- which is the south side of Chicago where bad, bad Leroy Brown is from, and where I had a 70 year old German lesbian hit on me in the Art Institute.

Ah- life in the city. Nothing beats it.

I did have a good trip, aside from the fact that my lovely travel companion unbuttoned her pants at every restaurant we went to. She also relied heavily on her southern charms to get things she wanted- and I always find that offensive. I took great care to make sure I used proper grammar at all times and that I didn’t gawk at the homeless or ask loud questions in the museum. Questions like, “Is that the REAL painting? I mean the for real one?” She was fun to travel with, but in some ways it reminded me a lot of chaperoning.

It’s the holiday season, so there were plenty of cool displays to see.

And I had a chance to do a lot while there; including going to a hockey game, which was made extra fun because of the wiener races.

Those are real wieners out there! I mean look at them. REALLY LOOK. I also got to see a fight, which got so violent that it made me slightly uncomfortable. But it was still cool and I would have been disappointed had I not seen some blood while at the game.

We made it to the top of the Sears Tower- which is a waste of $13, but does offer a cool view.

And I was able to get some REAL Chicago Pizza and my life is better for it. 4 inches of crust- it’s like I bathed in crispy bread! Why do I think a ‘yeast infection joke’ would work well here? Actually, almost everything I ate was really good. I was disappointed by a place called The Chop House. They boasted that they were rated the number 1 steak house in the country a few years ago. So we went and I blew the expense account to get a fillet. It was not as good as steaks I’ve cooked my self- which always pisses me off. If you can’t cook better than me, then you don’t need to claim to be a restaurant and you certainly don’t deserve to be rated anything extraordinary. They did redeem themselves by serving up a wicked Bloody Mary. I didn’t check the bill, but I’ll bet I paid $13 for that too.

Speaking of Wicked, I saw it. It’s a good theater production with great actresses and cool sets.

I did a little shopping, a little drinking, and a little work. It’s the best week at work I’ve had in a long time! I’m always up for returning to Chicago, but next time, I’d like to go in the Spring.

•   Comments(7)    Posted by liz on 12/15 at 11:29 PM
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