November’s Employee of the Month
Employee of the Month or Bribery Will Get You Everywhere.
I received a gift from one of my favorite blog world acquaintances yesterday. The gift was from a lovely gal who is known in Blogistan as Hellohahanarf. I would link to her, but she is a rarity, a non-blogging blog commenter.
She travels around for her job a good bit, and she said when she saw this hat, she immediately thought of me. Any time a girl thinks of me, it is a moment for me to relish. Especially if it gets her thinking about my testes. I think they might have tingled when she was thinking about them, or maybe it was just the Gold Bond Medicated powder causing the warm, glowing feeling. Regardless, I enjoyed it.
I am including a picture of the hat. It is an awesome gift, and I think it should be my new slogan.
To better show my appreciation I am going to do something unheard of here at Killer Rants. I am going to name an entity to be Employee of the Month, other than my balls, for two months in a row.
I am not sure if you actually have to be an “employee” of a organization to qualify for this monthly honor, but if so, I am willing to put her on the payroll. Maybe Liz is willing to share some office space.
,
I don’t have any actual photos of Hellohahanarf, but once, when I was at Jester’s, I did see one.
I did an artists rendering of what I saw. I put her in a bikini, because that is how I picture her in my imagination. I’m sure she won’t mind the artistic license I took.
My balls were not happy about being denied their rightful place as employee of the month a second time, but I doubled up on the Gold Bond powder.
It’s like crack for your junk.
Comments(18) 
Posted by killer on 12/04 at 12:07 AM-
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- Shane Warne said
Wow! Cute and lovely picture. Looks like so beautiful due to captured all of this photo such kind of wonderful moment. Keep it up.
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It’s nice to know about what you’ve written. You’re a brilliant writer.gift for a girlfriend
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My name is Kelsea and I am an associate casting producer for MTV. I am currently working on casting a new docu-series and we’re looking for young adults who have really stepped up to the plate and are helping their mom out who’s going through a hard time, whether it be going back to school, full-time job or even partying too much. We really want to congratulate these teens and document what they’ve been going through on a daily basis, as well as see if we can help in some way.
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hellohahanarf has been my top commenter for ages now. I should really work on some sort of annual bonus for her.
Maybe I can get some new pictures of your balls to send to her? I’m sure she’d appreciate that.
So you guys gonna plan on meeting us in Vegas next year?
By jester on 2007 12 04
Go on, show off your blog groupies. Pfft. Whatever.
By othurme on 2007 12 04
congrats, Hello! I’m so jealous.
Jester, when I first read your comment, I thought you said “anal bonus”. Must. Not. Blog-hop. Before. Coffee.
Ever.
By Mel-O-Drama on 2007 12 04
Yes. When one sees this hat, one does think of Killer.
But I doubt that I would have bought him the hat because a.) I would have thought that he already had the hat and a matching t-shirt, and b.) even in this holiday season I can be a cheap selfish bitch. Maybe I would have just sent a picture of the hat.
So the question is, if a girl sends you a picture of a hat, do your balls still get that warm fuzzy feeling?
By laughingattheslut on 2007 12 04
wow, killer, i am truly honored to be named employee of the month! if i would have known that you were so easily bought i would have sent you presents months ago. especially if i would have known how fabulous i look in a yellow bikini. wonderful drawing.
(hope it doesn’t hurt my eom status that i also sent the same hat to avitable. major difference is that i have never proposed marriage to avitable. you know my heart lies with your balls. wait. not what i meant. damn.)
jester, i would LOVE pictures of killer’s balls. yes, please do send!
mel, your comment was priceless. thanks for the early a.m. chuckle.
By hellohahanarf on 2007 12 04
laughing, i couldn’t have imagined killer hanging out in columbus ohio so i thought the hat was a safe way to buy his affections.
By hellohahanarf on 2007 12 04
Jester:
She is the best. I am still saddened by not being able to meet you guys this year, but I will make all effort to attend next time.
Othurme:
Don’t hate the player...hate the game.
Mel:
That might just be the annual bonus.
Laughing:
Any time someone thinks about my balls, they get all warm and fuzzy. That is why I started the blog, to get that feeling more.
Hello:
The original draft had the boobs so big, you could barely see your head. I am not sure if that is proportionate in real life, but I decided to shrink them to fit into the photo.
I knew you sent one to Avitable, but I knew I was better.
I have been to Columbus. It was the scene of my one and only eharmony date.
Maybe I need to do a series on my eharmony mishaps.
By Killer on 2007 12 04
oh yes, do tell of eharmony mishaps. especially if it happened in columbus of all places. get to writing. and don’t make me beg. it ain’t pretty.
By hellohahanarf on 2007 12 04
I thought GoldBond was like crack for your crack?
I also want to read about eharmony mishaps.
By churlita on 2007 12 04
um she sent me this pic....i think
By josiecatbaby on 2007 12 04
and this is what ive sent for the holiday....hoping i get the december award lol
By josiecatbaby on 2007 12 04
Oh, we must hear about this eHarmony business right away.
By laughingattheslut on 2007 12 04
Killer, good post. Hello, I’m not sure if I love what you’ve done or hate it. Do you know how often I’m going to have to see that NUTS hat perched on top of Killer’s head? Great. Now I’m going to be embarassed when we meet at Waffle House for hashbrowns.
By Liz on 2007 12 04
liz, don’t worry. i’ll find something equally as *ahem* wonderful *ahem* for you. but the question is, do you trust me with your address?
By hellohahanarf on 2007 12 04
Hello,
How thoughtful, but I’m frightened by your offer!
You’re not trying to knock your ‘Employee of the Month’ competition out of the picture, are you? I mean really, I am the only thing standing between you and Killer’s balls.
By liz on 2007 12 04
Hello:
I will have to recount all the memories of the eharmony adventures in my brain, give me a few days.
Churlita:
Balls-Crack, it’s only a matter of inches any way.
Josie:
I have a feeling my balls are going to HAVE to win in December. They need the attention.
Laughing:
I will comply post haste.
Liz:
I will let you wear the hat to your executive meetings if you want.
Hello:
You can send anything for Liz to me. I will get it to her, but I will try it on first. (send lingerie)
Liz:
Get out from between Hello and my balls!
By killer on 2007 12 04
liz, i wouldn’t dream of knocking you out of the competition. (as if i could...sheesh...you are the great and powerful liz after all!)
granted i would prefer nothing between me and killer’s balls, but…
By hellohahanarf on 2007 12 04
Now we must have pictures of Killer trying on lingerie.
Somebody send Killer some lingerie.
It won’t be me sending the lingerie. I am currently in cheap selfish bitch mode.
By laughingattheslut on 2007 12 05