Hypno Tooth

Sweet Home Mississippi

Whew, I made it back to Mississippi without crushing any more wild animals with my Brother in Law’s truck.  It wasn’t for lack of trying.  I must have swerved towards three possums and what was either a large armadillo or possibly a small, frail elderly woman.  Regardless of what it was, it moved pretty quick once it saw the headlights bearing down on them. 

While in the middle of nowhere, Arkansas, a guy at a craptacular liquor store asked to see my ID.  Upon seeing it he stated, “I drove through Mississippi once; in the dark.  I feel that is the only way to see Texas or Mississippi; in the dark.” Then he smiled hugely with pride and satisfaction for belittling my home state. 

I would have thought of a super, witty comeback about his present state of residence, Arkansas, but his one tooth had me mesmerized.  It was clinging tenaciously to his gums in utter defiance to modern dental care.  I couldn’t really know for sure whether it was an actual tooth or a strange yellow tumor. 

I haven’t slept since I saw it.

  • This is really freaky, but the same guy served me at Banjo’s in Strahan, Tasmania on the weekend.

    Rednecks are the same the world over.

    By Stella Devine on 2007 11 27

  • you should have punched the fucker in the tooth.  no reason to put down your home state.

    By hellohahanarf on 2007 11 27

  • I second the “punching the F**er in the tooth”.
    I may not miss all of Texas but I still have the Texas pride thing.

    Plus ya know I hate when people find out where you are from and think that it’s a golden opportunity window for them to chit-chat with you.
    Like you really care what they have to say - They should just hand over the booze and condoms and leave you the hell alone to go back to the hotel from whence you came…

    By Mayren on 2007 11 27

  • I get that kind of shit all the time, being from Iowa. Yes, we have electricty and running water, and no, we don’t have cows wandering the streets...At least not all the time.

    By churlita on 2007 11 27

  • i think punching the guy in the tooth would have done him a favor, why give him free dental work?  i do agree about the home state stuff, i mean i even get this.....south carolina huh, i know a friend of my 2nd counsins who lives in north carolina.  i mean just because they share a common name doesnt make them the same state.

    ps hope you enjoy this home vidio, i thought i would share, my nosey brother caught my kids going through my things…

    By josiecatbaby on 2007 11 27

  • http://www.cardclips.com/Images/Movies/momsanta.jpg
    ok try these, i never said i was computer savey...lol

    i cant even figure out how to get my gravatar to show

    By josiecatbaby on 2007 11 27

  • Toothlessness can be very alarming when witnessed among the employed.

    By abroad on 2007 11 27

  • We were out of state and had stopped somewhere for the night.  The next morning we saw that someone actually left a note on our truck that said something like--saw from your plates that you’re from Texas, went through Texas once and really liked it, hope to see you in the morning before you leave, if you want to chat were in room ___, or we’ll be home day after tomorrow and the phone number is _______________.

    I can’t remember what overly friendly place we were driving through at the time.  But that was a bit weird, even for us.

    By laughingattheslut on 2007 11 27

  • I am just now able to check in. First of all, thanks for the heads up on the video. That’s cute. Secondly, YOUR GRANDPARENTS read this blog? Oh my god. I’ll bet they are scared of me....

    By Liz on 2007 11 27

  • Stella:
    True, Rednecks are universal, as is bad teeth.

    I was afraid of what might spray out of the tooth like abscess.

    yes, it is hard to be outraged at his behavior when he is the one still holding my Mad Dog 20/20.

    People make fun of Iowa?  I thought it was just the Southern States that had that problem.

    Aren’t North and South Carolina the same thing? 

    I don’t understand why he did not just go ahead and rip out that last one.  I can’t be doing that much good.

    Sounds like they had you guys pegged as swingers.

    Thanks for showing up...now get back to work.

    By Killer on 2007 11 27

  • I have seen you around my neck of the blog world.  I finally decided to come on over and check this place out.  Cool man, nice place ya got here.

    Being from Cleveland Ohio, self deprecating “I’m from Cleveland” humor is a way of life.  It is both easy and convenient to blast on Cleveland to my advantage when I am out of town.  As far as everyone else knows the river still is on fire, the mayors have included a guy whose hair started on fire and Kucinich, and I am proud to hail from the mistake on the lake.

    I have found myself mesmerized by a single,solitary tooth in the past as well.

    By Evil-E on 2007 11 27

  • I drove threw arkansas one time. I probably would never live there. The only thing I saw there was little rock. It got dark soon and I was happy it did

    By houston uptown apartments on 2008 10 16

  • Great blog - at times you make it sound all exciting and I wish I could be there.I thoroughly enjoyed on reading the article.I think , it should be a great trip for you.

    By jessica on 2008 12 03

  • This is an extremely helpful post, This is the one What I was actually looking for.Words are insufficient to describe your work .Keep it up!

    By Jessica on 2009 01 13

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